The Tragic Tale of Alaina Micheals
I'm an ugly, lousy excuse for a human being. I don't deserve to be here, I've been told that many times so it must be true. I definitely don't deserve to be here. I don't deserve to stay in a huge mansion with my sister.
A few years ago, near my fourteenth birthday, my parents got a divorce. It was devastating and took a toll on my entire family. I can't say I didn't expect it though. They would argue all the time. My mother was a cruel and hateful person, while my father was an artistic and adventurous man. Needless to say, he was my favorite of the two people. I looked up to him.
I can still clearly remember the last time I ever saw my dad. We exchanged farewells and gave each other one last hug. After that he left and I never saw him again. He cut off all ties with us. It was understandable, but he always said he loved me, that I was his favorite daughter. How can he not even so much as call me for three years then? Since the divorce my mother has become even more hateful. She yells at me on a daily basis and says I don't even deserve to be in the world. She adores my sister though. But who could blame her?
My sister Samantha is gorgeous. She has blonde hair, blue eyes, and is an exact replica of our mother. Samantha is friendly, caring, and intelligent. She has everything I want, and that's why I envy her. The worst part of it all, is that she doesn't have a single mean spirited bone in her body. No matter what I say and how mean it is she never argues back. That's what makes me hate her most of all.
Our mother didn't make it a secret of who she preferred. They always spend time together and laugh about nonsense. I don't blame my mother for liking her best though. She's the daughter that has everything and looks like her. I'm the daughter that looks like the man who broke her heart. Sometimes I feel as if I am Cinderella except my sister is prettier than me. I wonder if life will ever really be on my side.
The only time I was ever truly happy in the past three years was when I had a dream of being in this odd place and a guy was kissing me and stroking my cheek. The dream felt so real though, I could imagine everything so vividly! I was very disappointed when I woke up. But now I have dreams like that every night. But why?
Hi! Thank you all for reading the first chapter of "The Tragic Tale of Alaina Micheals"! I know it isn't so good right now, but trust me I will improve! Leave comments and feedback below! This is dedicated to the awesome xxxemmasaurus from the Sims 3 Website!
*The guy sim used in the dream sequence was not created by me. I downloaded him straight from the exchange.*
I loved it! Keep goooing! :3
ReplyDeleteI like it so far! :D
ReplyDeleteA tip though, when taking pictures, zoom in as much as you can and put the walls up! :D
Also like Drew says with Pictures.
ReplyDeleteTry and make it a size larger in the game in the options. The better the quality the better the picture the more readers you'll get. Pictures are a good thing! :D
Also Learning Camera controls are awesome too :D
Press Tab to go into Camera Mode
Move Left/Right :: [←] / [→] and [A] / [D]
Move Forward/Backward :: [↑] / [↓] and [W] / [S]
Move Faster :: [Shift] + [←] / [→] / [↑] / [↓] or [Shift] + [A] / [D] / [W] / [S]
Zoom In/Out :: [Z] / [X] or [+] / [-]
Rotate Left / Right :: [,] / [.]
Save Camera Position 1-5 :: [Control] + [5] through [9]
Restore Camera Position 1-5 :: [5] through [9]
Snap to Camera Position 1-5 :: [Shift] + [5] through [9]
Toggle Map Mode :: [M]
Hey I learned something new just now. Great info on camera tools. Okay first of all take disregard what you will. Second Believe in yourself and write for yourself. Now the tough part. I enjoyed your story very much and have high hopes of seeing it continue. The only thing I wish to comment on is you tend to tell how the story goes instead of showing us what happens. I know I'm one to tell and have to struggle to show the reader the scene instead of laying it out in a matter of fact. Avanis is one of the best people I know who can show you a scene in great details. But I will try to give you an example.
ReplyDeleteInstead of; Far away I spotted a man in the distance. He had brown hair, a muscular build, and was reading a book outside of a cafe. I could tell almost instantly, that he was my father. I walked up to him. I had always thought long and hard about what I would say or do if I ever got the chance to see him again. Then, I knew what I wanted to do.
Try (and this is just an example. find your own voice. It will come to you.)
My eyes caught a familiar figure across the way. He was deeply emerged in a book at the Cafe. My heart lodged into my throat as I excused myself and ran towards him. It couldn't be. Not him. Not my father. But it was, there was no doubt about it. Anger overcame me the closer I got to him "Daddy?"...
Hi! This is Addie, I'm writing the Cathrach Legacy that you were kind enough to comment on, and, as promised, I'm returning the favor. I like your story, and it's really got some promise. One thing I would do though is do a quick read through before you post, you left out a couple of words, like you said "me and my in" I think you forgot to put sister. It happens to me ALL the time. But other than that it was great! Just remember that starting is the hardest part. Keep posting and I'll keep reading :)
ReplyDeleteHello, Cuddles. I have just started reading and I like it! It will take about a week for me to work you into the queue of my blog but I will be very pleased to feature Alaina's story.
ReplyDelete